Saturday's Child

...if you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you...

There's talk of a space elevator going 62,000 miles into the sky - wonder if they're getting the material from Home Depot on 61st St. in Galveston?

Madonna gets a new name - I'm sure her parents are proud! I'd tell you what it is but I forgot. Maybe I'll remember her next one when I catch her next hair color in a week or two. I'm sure she couldn't complain, since she'd forgotten the words to John Lennon's "Imagine" while performing it the other night.

A man went into a Walmart in Naples, Fl. to get some garbage bags, covered in blood. Luckily, the Walmart police were able to nab him for murder...when will these murderers learn to wash the blood off in the Atlantic before going to Walmart? its only polite!

EL PASO, Texas (AP) -- First it was named one of the least literate cities in the nation, then one of the fattest and the sweatiest. El Paso has had enough. Residents insist their city is no dumber, fatter or sweatier than any other. Now everyone KNOWS that Houston is the fattest, sweatiest and most illiterate city in the country! How dare they they steal our thunder!

Why does my 6'2" husband always tell his 5'2" wife when the light bulbs blow out?

Galvestonians are complaining about having to wait nearly a week before there's a respite from the rain. As a transposed ex New Yorker, I find the weather such a relief from the unrelenting sunshine and heat. After almost 5 years, I still insist that these wet weeks are the most comfortable times to get anything done between the months of May and October.